〜てほしい

〜てほしい is a particular expression in Japanese. It is composed of the verb in the 〜て form, and of the adjective ほしい, which we saw in sentences like 'I want a dog' 犬がほしい. This construction only works with nouns, but we can also use ほしい with verbs in their 〜て form. In this form, it will mean that you wish for something to happen.

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In this case, it will be translated as 'I want (something to happen)', although we do not use the typical 〜たい ending of verbs in this case. We will see the difference between 〜てほしい and 〜たい at the end.

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As an example, let's say you would want your lover to do more chores around the house.

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掃除機をかけてほしい。

Soujiki o kakete hoshii.

I want (him) to vacuum.

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We can also translate it as 'I wish he would vacuum'. If you utter this wish to your lover's face, 'you' will be omitted, like in the example; if it is clear we are talking about your lover, 'him' will also be omitted. However, if it is not clear and we want to add 'him', we will need the particle に.

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彼に掃除機をかけてほしい。

Kare ni soujiki o kakete hoshii.

I wish he would vacuum.

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The particle に acts like a pin in this case. We can also add the particle も to say 'I want him too to vacuum'.

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彼(に)も掃除機をかけてほしい。

Kare (ni) mo soujiki o kakete hoshii.

I also want him to vacuum.

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You can drop the particle に in this case. 

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Be careful when using this expression; we cannot use it as a request, since it is pretty direct, so you might sound rude. To make requests, it is better to use the expression ください instead.

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Now, let's see the difference between the ending 〜たい and the expression 〜てほしい. Let's say that you are attending a class right now, and the class is really boring. You tell yourself that you wish class would end quickly.

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早く終わってほしい。

Hayaku owatte hoshii.

I want it to end quickly.

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The difference with 〜てほしい and 〜たい will lie on who is doing the action.

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早くクラスが終わってほしい。

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早くクラスを終わりたい。

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In the first sentence, the one doing the action 終わる (to finish, to end) is the class. This is apparent because of the particle が. You only wish that class would end, you are not the one ending the class.

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In the second example, the one doing the action is you. This is also apparent because of the particle を. You do not wish the class to end, you want to end the class. In the event where you are the student in the class, and not the teacher, you have no control over the situation. Thus, using the expression 〜てほしい will make more sense.

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Using the particles が and に with 〜てほしい

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We saw two examples above, one with the particle に and one with the particle が.

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彼に掃除機をかけてほしい。

早くクラスが終わってほしい。

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There are rules when it comes to which particle to use. Usually, for living things, like 'him' in the first sentence, we will use the particle に. 

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彼に病院に行ってほしいの。

Kare ni byouin no itte hoshii no.

I want him to go to the hospital.

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For non-living things, we will prefer to use the particle が.

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雪が降ってほしい。

Yuki ga futte hoshii.

I want snow to fall.

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Sometimes, however, the particle に can be employed if what we talk about is a specific thing, like a specific type of snow.

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ふわふわ雪に降ってほしい。

Fuwafuwa yuki ni futte hoshii.

I want fluffy snow to fall.

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この曲が（に）売れてほしい。

Kono kyoku ga (ni) urete hoshii.

I wantthis song to sell well.

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In this case, both can be used as it is this song in particular you want to sell well.

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You can also put 〜てほしい in any verb tenses by conjugating ほしい; it will be conjugated like a い adjective.

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〜てほしくない for not wanting something to happen

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You can use the negative to say that you do not want something to happen.

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そういうことは言ってほしくない。

Sou iu koto wa itte hoshikunai.

I don't want you to say things like this.

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It also works for commands as well.

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そういうことは言わないでほしい。

Sou iu koto wa iwanaide hoshii.

I want you to not say such things.

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In this case, we will use 言わないで, which is the command for not doing something, and ほしい in the affirmative.

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〜てほしい？ to ask 'do you want me to...?

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We can use this construction to ask if somebody wants us to do something. As a normal statement, it would mean that we want something to happen, for instance:

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一緒に勉強してほしい。

Issho ni benkyou shite hoshii.

I want you to study with me.

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But with a raising tone, this sentence can turn into 'do you want me to study with you?'

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一緒に勉強してほしい？

Issho ni benkyou shite hoshii?

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Be careful when using this expression in question sentences! Unless you know the person very well, you may sound rude and a bit arrogant. Since 〜てほしい is commonly used to mean that we want someone else to do something, using it in question sentences can sound like you are putting on airs. It demonstrates that you are aware that you have discretion over the choice of studying together and that the other person is the one who has to say 'please'.

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Let's look at another example:

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おもしろい情報ゲットしたんだけど、教えてほしい？

Omoshiroi jouhou getto shitanda kedo, oshiete hoshii?

I got some interesting information, you want me to share?

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It can sound a bit arrogant. 

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〜させてほしい for asking permission to do something

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The causative form 〜させる can be used with ほしい to convey that you want someone to let you do something. We saw that the causative form was used to express that someone is forcing or allowing someone else to do something. Formed with ほしい, it will mean that you wish someone would let you do something.

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留学させてほしい。

Ryuugaku sasete hoshii.

I want you to let me go study abroad.

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アメリカに行かせてほしい。

Amerika ni ikasete hoshii.

I wat you to let me go to the USA.

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Depending on the context, 〜させてほしい can also mean that you want someone, or (allow) someone else to do something. For instance, if you want your spouse to make sure that the children are fed by 6 o'clock, you can say:

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六時までに夕ご飯を食べさせてほしい。

Roku ji made ni yuugohan o tabesasete hoshii.

I want you to fed (the kids) by 6 o'clock.

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〜てほしがる for someone else's desires

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You remember がる? It was plugged to adjectives to say that someone looked like a certain way, and to ほしい to say that someone seemed to want something. In Japanese, we cannot use the same construction for both expressing our desires and the desires of others. So, we will use がる to express the desires of other people, and that same rule applies for the expression 〜てほしい.

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子共たち、ずっと遊んでほしがるんだよ。

Kodomo tachi, zutto asonde hoshigarunda yo.

The kids always want me to play with them.

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子共がおかしを買ってほしがる。

Kodomo ga okashi o katte hoshigaru.

The kid wants me to buy him candy.

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Making more polite requests

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It is true that 〜てほしい does not work for making requests, but it can work if we add other elements to soften our requests. One of them is the use of 〜んだ or 〜んです (explanatory feeling) to be more polite. This will give an explanation to the request. We will also add が or けど to set it in the background, and add a phrase like おねがいできます, to check if it is okay to make a request. 

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Another way is to use かな or かしら to imply uncertainty, or simply use 〜てもいい to give the chance to the person to say no.

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部屋を掃除してほしいんだけど、おねがいできるかな？

Heya o souji shite hoshiinda kedo, onegai dekiru kana?

I want you to clean your room, can you do that for me?

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この資料を確認してほしいんですが、おねがいしてもいいですか？

Kono shiryou o kakunin shite hoshiindesu ga, onegai shite mo ii desu ka?

I want you to review this document, if I can trouble you with it.

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Even though all the sentences above are polite thanks to the other elements added, 〜てほしい is still a direct way of making requests. You can use it if you are on friendly terms with the other person, if not, you can switch to a similar expression with 〜てもらいたい to sound more appreciative.

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この資料を確認してもらいたいんですが、おねがいしてもいいですか？

Kono shiryou o kakunin shite moraitain desu ga, onegai shite mo ii desu ka?

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〜てもらいたい is in fact 〜てもらう, which means that you receive a favor from someone. This form is more polite, because it shows that you are aware that you are asking for a favor. 

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If you are talking to someone who is higher up in society, you use 〜ていただきたい. For instance, if you are talking to the president of your company:

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この資料を確認していただきたいんですが、おねがいしてもよろしいでしょうか？

Kono shiryou o kakunin shite itadakitain desu ga, onegai shite mo yoroshii deshou ka?

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The sentence will become longer the more polite you are. おねがいしてもいいですか becomes おねがいしてもよろしいでしょうか in higher polite standards.

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Example in a manga:

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Here is an example of 〜てほしい in an excerpt from the manga デキル猫は今日も憂鬱.

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